Family first

I’ve been selfish. Selfish to think that just because my son is now an adult that I can do what I want. Selfish to think that it’s time for me. I’ve always ached for more children and I suppose there a real reason I only have one. Recently, it’s weighed heavily on my heart and I’ve been thinking about being a foster parent. I’ve thought about moving to Arizona, where I’ve wanted to be since I was 20. Family has to come first, always. So, what truly has been a heavy thought, with all my heart and soul, is what to do with my parents. My sister.  My nephew. My entire immediate family lives on the east coast. My parents, alcoholics. Dad is a cancer survivor with COPD and maybe emphysema. My mom, well she hasn’t been to a doctor in probably 15 years. My sister and nephew are healthy, hard workers. The quality of life they could all have here is so much greater. Maybe that’s what I’m supposed to do. Maybe I’m not ready to put myself first. But then I think, “when has my family been there for me?”. Not at my wedding. Not present during the birth of my child. Not one family member. Only one visit from them to my home in 22 years. It’s been so long and I don’t turn my back on anyone. Really. I need my family.  They need me. So will they come?

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About k1nd3r5t3w

Born and raised in Maine. US Army Veteran, living in Kansas! Love road trips and my son. Go PATRIOTS. Amateur writer who just writes from the heart. Runner.
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